I live in Medway, and it doesn’t take much in depth knowledge of the compass to work out that Medway is in the South of England. But I’m not from Medway, I’m from a land far, far away, Newark, Nottinghamshire. Seemingly both from my accent and looking at a map, no-one has ever been quite able to place quite where I’m from, (Often I get, well you’re certainly English aren’t you).

I have always had a fair idea as to how I would categorise where I’m from. But to some people, where I think I’m from doesn’t exist, now unless I, and by extension of me, this blog post is a vivid and excellent figment of your imagination, where I’m from must exist, because that’s where I’m from. 

After reading this some of you may be questioning the statement that I am English, as it may have made no sense to you. I endeavour to change this.

A little while ago on Twitter I saw one of the great debates in British culture. And I’m not talking about whether scone rhymes with bone or gone.

It was about what is the dividing line of the North and South, many places where suggested Watford? Cambridge? Nottingham?

All very worthy suggestions, sadly all of them as misguided as each other. The North and the South don’t meet at a neat and tidy line, wherever you think this is- as one astute observer pointed out. 

Yes Stuie. Of course, they are separated by the Midlands. Made up of the West Midlands and its Balti loving heart, Birmingham. And of course, the King of English regions, the East Midlands, a green and (largely) pleasant land centred around a city with history of gang violence and recently burned down stations, Nottingham. (By a history of gang violence, I am of course referring to Robin Hood and his Merry Men.) 

A recent YouGov poll happily concluded that 62% of English adults don’t think the East Midlands is part of the North or South, with the figure being 65% for the West Midlands. 

Wherever you're from, I hope you recognice my homeland and therefore me, as real. 

North? South? No- it’s the Middle